Weird.
I have a married friend who thinks that I must be weird because I don't want to re-marry. It's hard for some people to comprehend being happily solo, though I know many people would understand me perfectly well.
I am happy alone. I am not looking for a soulmate. I don't want one. I don't want to get married or date. I enjoy driving in my car alone. I enjoy sleeping alone. I even enjoy dining in restaurants alone. I don't need anyone around in order to devour a book and understand its message. I don't need anyone to rouse my attention to the clattering of pear tree leaves in the evening. Crickets sound just as soothing without another pair of ears resonating to their monotonous rhythm.
Aside from my son, of course, who sits next to me at the open window, his chubby arms crossed beneath his chin as he smiles and listens and watches with me.
I am no less of a person, my existence is no less fulfilled, without a romantic partner. What would that one extra person add to my life that I don't already derive from myself, my family, or my friends?
I'm not a poor old maid who will die having never experienced true love or passion or romance. I've had all of that, thank you, and it was lovely. I wouldn't change a moment of it. Not even the heartache. However, when I was in love with someone else, I hardly had a spare moment for myself. I had no time to press my palms into clover patches just to feel their cool softness. I had no time to stand and stare at swaths of stars or to notice the changing shape and color of the moon. I had no time to pull apart pansies to find the hidden pansy king. I bet you married people didn't even know he existed. I didn't have time to take up the guitar or to sketch trees or to write poems.
I've been married. It was mostly lovely at times. I'm not anti-marriage, but it's important for a girl to know what she wants. I want time for my son and time for myself. I don't think that a man exists who would be able to provide that for me.
It's hard for some people to distinguish between a person who is alone and a person who is lonely. In fact, I am neither. I am surrounded by people who love and respect me. I don't want more than that.
I am happy alone. I am not looking for a soulmate. I don't want one. I don't want to get married or date. I enjoy driving in my car alone. I enjoy sleeping alone. I even enjoy dining in restaurants alone. I don't need anyone around in order to devour a book and understand its message. I don't need anyone to rouse my attention to the clattering of pear tree leaves in the evening. Crickets sound just as soothing without another pair of ears resonating to their monotonous rhythm.
Aside from my son, of course, who sits next to me at the open window, his chubby arms crossed beneath his chin as he smiles and listens and watches with me.
I am no less of a person, my existence is no less fulfilled, without a romantic partner. What would that one extra person add to my life that I don't already derive from myself, my family, or my friends?
I'm not a poor old maid who will die having never experienced true love or passion or romance. I've had all of that, thank you, and it was lovely. I wouldn't change a moment of it. Not even the heartache. However, when I was in love with someone else, I hardly had a spare moment for myself. I had no time to press my palms into clover patches just to feel their cool softness. I had no time to stand and stare at swaths of stars or to notice the changing shape and color of the moon. I had no time to pull apart pansies to find the hidden pansy king. I bet you married people didn't even know he existed. I didn't have time to take up the guitar or to sketch trees or to write poems.
I've been married. It was mostly lovely at times. I'm not anti-marriage, but it's important for a girl to know what she wants. I want time for my son and time for myself. I don't think that a man exists who would be able to provide that for me.
It's hard for some people to distinguish between a person who is alone and a person who is lonely. In fact, I am neither. I am surrounded by people who love and respect me. I don't want more than that.
posted by Autumn at 7:28 PM
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